Troubadour, December 2011
Click here for a printable version
In Anticipation
by Kristin White
“It is a place of silence, not because it is untouched by all the activity of our lives, but because it is capable of wonder. Every prayer begins with silent wonder before it turns to words. Our first response to God is dumbstruck awe at who he is and what he has done for us.”
~Fr. William Frebuger
Today I stood in Starbucks on a date with my third son, Micah. We ordered drinks and an old fashioned donut for him. On the stereo, Christmas music blared; all the merchandise was in red and white with green accents. My latte came in their classic Christmas cup; red and white… And it is mid- November. We are not even at Thanksgiving. When we left, we walked through the rain to our car, our rain boots crunching over the orange and yellow leaves, and we got into our car and turned the radio on and there it was again, Christmas music. I know that many places have started celebrating the holiday seasons early, but I can’t ever remember it being this early.
However, by the time you read this, we will already be in Advent… maybe two of your candles will already be blazing during dinner and you may already have your tree decorated. And you’ll already feel those little beads of anticipation for Christmas, because whether the feeling is stress, anxiousness, or excitement, we all have them. We never grow out of them.
Advent in recent years has begun to remind me of pregnancy. There is the beginning, which is the overwhelming feeling of everything to come… Our calendar begins to fill (slightly nauseous), maybe we have letters to write cards to fill out (absolutely exhausted), and it seems far away (it takes forever). Then there is the music at Mass that begins to fill you with hope (anticipation); you start to receive cards and updates from people you love (you get an ultrasound and show everyone a grainy picture of your child). And then things begin to happen really fast… you go to an ornament exchange (it’s like a baby shower), everyone ooh’s and aah’s. You go to a fancy party and dance the night away (suddenly your ankles are swollen). And then the anticipation starts to build (you can’t see your feet). Everywhere you go, every thought you think is filled with anticipation (and the movement is constant). The day is almost here, but you’re not sure if you’re ready… if you’ll ever be ready. But Hope, Love, Joy, and Peace are strong. Suddenly it’s here: what you’ve been preparing for all Advent… (the celebration of the birth of a baby). The birth of Christ.
As a Mother of four kids in different places and stages, I have been trying very hard to show the importance of patience in Advent and emphasize that the magic is not in gifts or anticipation of St. Nicholas, but the mystery of why God would send a baby, his only son, to be born in poverty, to save the world. To save you and me.
But again, as a Mother, I think that God’s plan was something I learned the minute I became a parent: babies transform us. I even know it from my friends that have adopted; they, like Joseph, were changed the minute they heard about their child — no longer thinking of him or her as some child, suddenly that was “their” child. Motherhood has changed me. And this transformation continues with the gift of each of my children… and each is just as powerful. When I think about the first moment I looked down and saw them looking at me, blinking, breathing, I am silent in awe of the miracle of life.
In those silent moments, I wasn’t scared of the unknown… all I thought about was that I was so unworthy of such a great gift. And all those days of preparation seemed so long ago, because in those moments of awe I couldn’t imagine a life where this child didn’t exist.
So of course God would bring his son into the world in the most humble circumstances — as a baby, to a teenage girl and her husband. Because he never promised predictability, He promised life. And because we needed Jesus, desperately. We still do.
So while we are broken this Advent, once again, God is offering us Hope. While we are hurting, God is there to Love us. While we mourn, He is offering us moments of Joy. And in the restlessness of resentment and hurt, He offers us Forgiveness and Peace.
A world without faith is unimaginable to me. We may see some magic, but we’d miss the mystery, the miracle, the life. So maybe that’s why the Christmas music is playing so early? Maybe this year we all need to feel that hope a little earlier… Maybe we need a little more Jesus.
A 10-Minute Christmas Homily
by Robert Fontana
Picture this: it’s Christmas Eve. Many families are attending Mass or church services for the first time since Easter. All are dressed in their Sunday best. Everyone is singing because they know and love the Christmas carols being sung. Indeed, many families arrived early for the caroling that is often done before Mass. And, if it is the service for families, there are students from religious education or youth ministry who are dressed in costume to act out the nativity story. What do parishioners, especially the children, need to hear from their priest on this holiest of nights? Two things:
1) GOD LOVES YOU AND HAS A PURPOSE FOR YOUR LIFE; and
2) LOVE GOD BY DOING GOD’S WILL.
There is a lot happening this night in and out of Mass. This homily need only take eight to ten minutes, but I guarantee you, all present, especially the children and youth, will listen to this 10-minute Christmas homily!
MERRY CHRISTMAS, Church! All children who are the Church, raise your hands. Merry Christmas!
All youth who are the Church, raise your hands. Merry Christmas!
All adults who are the Church, raise your hands. Merry Christmas!
Why do we say Merry Christmas? Why do we celebrate with parties, service, gift-giving, and Mass? What does Christmas mean, anyway? It is not rocket science. Unlike Santa Claus, God loves us not simply when we are being nice, but also when we are being naughty. Remember the song, “Santa Clause is coming to Town.” Sing it with me. “You better watch out…”
Is God like that: only bringing gifts to those who are nice? NO! Whether we are naughty or nice, God loves us. How do we know? Jesus was born. And because of the great gift of Jesus to everyone, the naughty and the nice, we joyfully shout “Merry Christmas!”
Now, I need your help. When I raise my hand like this (hand is raised high in the air) I want you to say “God loves us.” Let’s practice. (Raised hand; all shout out “God loves us.”)
If we secretly open our Christmas presents early to see what’s in them (raise hand)… God loves us.
If we eat the cookies and drink the milk mom set out for Santa (raise hand)… God loves us.
If we yell at our siblings and refuse to share our toys (raise hand)… God loves us.
Or if we ignore the poverty in the world and live selfish, self-centered lives (raise hand)… God loves us.
God loves us just as we are, naughty or nice, but God doesn’t just love us. God has a plan for us this side of heaven. God does not just want to get us to heaven, God wants us to know a measure of heaven on earth. Remember what we pray in the Lord’s Prayer. Say it with me, “Our Father who art in heaven, hallowed be thy name, thy kingdom come thy will be done…” Stop there.
Jesus said that when God’s will is done we bring heaven to earth. And God’s will is not complicated, but it is more than just being nice, it is being loving. Husbands love your wives; wives love your husbands; parents love your children; children love (and listen to) your parents. Families and individuals love one another, love the poor and the sick, and love the earth.
But Christmas is not only about God’s love for us and God’s plan that we bring heaven to earth by doing God’s will. Christmas also asks “How much do we love God?” Jesus said that the greatest commandment is to love God with all our heart, mind, and strength. Why? Because if we love God, we will want to do God’s will, and if we do God’s will, we bring heaven to earth.
All through Advent, Christmas, and Epiphany we have read about or will read about the saints in Scripture who loved God and did God’s will. They brought heaven to earth. I’m going to say the names of these people. After each time I do so, I want you to shout out “and did God’s will.” Let’s practice.
John the Baptist loved God… (All:) and did God’s will.
Elizabeth loved God… (All:) and did God’s will.
Mary and Joseph loved God… (All:) and did God’s will.
Angels in heaven loved God… (All:) and did God’s will.
The Magi loved God… (All:) and did God’s will.
The Shepherds loved God… (All:) and did God’s will.
Moms and dads loved God… (All:) and did God’s will.
Children and youth loved God… (All:) and did God’s will.
The Church loved God… (All:) and did God’s will.
Merry Christmas, Church! God loves us all and wants us to bring heaven to earth. Let’s love God back and do God’s will by loving one another, loving the poor and sick, and loving the earth. Amen.
Success in Belize
by Robert Fontana
I just returned from an 11-day trip to the Diocese of Belize City. Three days were for traveling. In between I led a team of five couples through a night and day of training to teach them to present a series of workshops on marriage, spoke to six different high schools and a junior college, spoke at a juvenile prison, helped a team of couples design a marriage preparation ministry, and led a three-day workshop for married couples called Discover the Amazing Gift of Your Marriage.
Whoa! I am tired, but very satisfied because it was such a successful trip. I know it was successful because I received great feedback from the participants — including the 15- to 19-year-olds who were in prison. But one person’s comments stand out. An old nun, the principal of an all-girl’s school probably spoke for everyone else when she grabbed my hand and said,
“Oh Dr. Fontana, I did not expect the girls to listen to you being that you are so old and unattractive, but they did. You held their attention and they listened to every word you said.”
Oh, the truth hurts: old and unattractive. Thank you, Jesus. Thank you that my feeble body and mind, my lack of hair and brawn, my expanding waist-line and boring attire did not get in the way of the message.
What was the message? To the adults it was, “Work on your marriage and your marriage will work,” and you will enjoy a foretaste of heaven, joy, peace, love, generosity, etc. Not perfectly, and not without suffering, but when you succeed in marriage you gain treasures that cannot be bought.
To the youth, even in prison, it was this “Men are jerks, women are stupid.” Yes, this was “tongue-in-cheek,” and the youth understood it and loved it. We played and had fun with the topic. The girls thoroughly enjoyed yelling that the boys were jerks and the boys dished it back yelling, “Women are stupid.” I explained that, as a pattern, men are driven by sexual energy, and if that energy isn’t disciplined, it does stupid and hurtful things. The guys in prison agreed, so did the girls in the schools.
When I asked, “Why do I say women are stupid?” A young girl raised her hand and said, “Because we believe the boys.” Women, as a pattern, are wired for relationships, and they want to connect with the boy or young man they care about.
But when sexual energy is disciplined and reciprocated in a covenant of love (marriage), man and woman are liberated to be their best selves. Therefore, “Nobody gets your body without making an absolute commitment to your future (and the future of any children that might be forthcoming).
Note: Bring me to your parish church and school for Discover the Amazing Gift of Your Marriage and Men are Jerks, Women are Stupid. It will be great fun! Call 509-731-6012 or email Robert@catholiclifeministries.org.
Remember to prepare for Christmas by praying through Advent using the Advent wreath.
These can be purchased at most Christian and secular books stores.
