Catholic Life Ministries

Click here for a printable version

Baby Jesus, Eucharist, and Chief! (A Five-Minute Christmas homily)

by Robert Fontana

Merry Christmas, Church! It’s Christmas and let the Church shout, “GLORY!” I want to speak with you on this glorious day about Baby Jesus, the Eucharist, and “Chief,” which is a nickname given to my father by his band students.

“God is love” says St. John, and if Christmas means anything it means this: OUR DADDY GOD LOVES YOU, ME, AND EVERY HUMAN BEING THAT EVER LIVED, THAT IS ALIVE NOW, AND THAT WILL LIVE IN THE FUTURE.

Let the Church shout, “GLORY!”

Furthermore, God is not like Santa Claus — checking to see who is naughty or nice. God wants everyone, good and bad, patriot and terrorist, saint and sinner to be saved and to be a part of the heavenly family. And so when God considered how to rescue the human race and all of creation from sin and suffering, He determined that the only way he could do this was to unite Himself completely to us.

In a sense, Christmas is God’s wedding day with the human race, the day when God made with us an irrevocable covenant of love through the birth of Jesus, the God-Man. Love was born in Jesus. Divinity took flesh and blood in Jesus. We call this truth the Incarnation.

Let the Church shout, “Glory!

Christmas and the Incarnation continue in the Eucharist. Every time we celebrate the Eucharist and receive the communion Bread and Wine, we re-enact Jesus’ Incarnation. Now, however, rather than giving himself to us as a baby, God gives himself to us completely in the Eucharistic Bread and Wine. Jesus does not hold back. Everything that makes Jesus who He is—Body, Soul, and Divinity–are given to us in the Eucharist. Jesus makes a total gift of himself to us and invites us to respond likewise.

So when you come to communion this Christmas, do not hold back. Give yourself completely to Jesus as you would to your spouse on your wedding day. Give Jesus all your joys and sorrows, all your faith, hope, and love.

Let the Church shout, “Glory!”

Christmas/the Incarnation took place in history 2000 years ago when Jesus was born in Bethlehem. Christmas/the Incarnation takes place sacramentally in the communion Bread and Wine every time we celebrate Mass. And Christmas/the Incarnation takes place spiritually every time you and I sincerely and without hesitation give of ourselves to one another in love and service.

My dad was a band director at a public high school, where he taught music for over 37 years. To his students he was “Chief.” And when “Chief” died at the young age of 61, many of his former students came to tell our family about the amazing impact that “Chief” had made on their lives. Apparently Dad did more than teach them music. He gave of himself; he poured out his life in love and service so that they would succeed not merely as band students but as citizens and neighbors, spouses and parents.

Love took flesh; it was incarnated in Chief’s life. Truly, whenever you, as a plumber, cook, custodian, housecleaner, business person, teacher, politician, soldier, police officer or whatever you do, give your life in selfless love to another, the Incarnation happens.

Let Christmas be born in your life! Give your life to Jesus, give your life to one another, and let the Incarnation happen again and again.

And let the Church say, “Glory!” Amen!

But Mommy it’s Cold Outside…

by Kristin White

My Daniel has a new winter coat. It is puffy and green and has a hood on it. He loves it and is so proud to wear it. As his mother I’m not quite as proud about how his puffy new winter coat came to be.

It all started with an email I received when I got off work one day… An email that said: Dear Daniel’s Mom. We had noticed Daniel was very cold at recess, and when we asked him why he didn’t have his coat, he let us know that he didn’t have one. So we found him one, in his favorite color and already wrote his name in it. What it didn’t say, but what I read was: “You are a sham of a mom. Shame on you for not having a coat for your son during this frigid weather, and because of this you are out of the running for America’s Top Mom… Again.”

When I read over the email, I went through a broad range of emotions… mortification, sadness, anger, because my Daniel has two winter coats, one spring coat, and a rainydays-and-Monday’s-always-get-me-down-coat. He had just been refusing to wear one in the morning, and I, being consistent and stubborn, said, “If you choose not to wear a coat, you are choosing to be cold,” in hopes that eventually he’d be cold enough to wear a coat. And he was, just not for me.

I emailed the teacher, and explained what had happened, and let her know we would dealing with it at home, me, Mother of the year, with the poor coatless child. And when I saw her that day, she didn’t look at me like I was the spawn of all things neglectful – she laughed. And so did my husband.

But I couldn’t get over it. Because I knew how it all unfolded. I could see my son, huddled cold, shivering as the parent volunteer helped him get into his new coat, a coat his mother didn’t send him to school with. Acting pitiful and cold as he picked out a coat in his favorite color… I know that martyr act. I invented it. This is my child who is most like me, and I am on to him.

Later after we’d purchased a new coat to donate to the school, one that he chose after I explained why it was not okay what he did, I sat stewing at home about it. I kept thinking about what people must be thinking of me. About how I was perceived. If we truly couldn’t afford a jacket, I would’ve still found a way to provide one. But he didn’t have one because he chose not to; but I felt I was being punished for it. And my lovely husband, usually so sympathetic, just laughed and laughed.

“Why is it bothering you so much? Still?” he asked.

And then like all profound things in my life, I realized it as I was avoiding folding laundry: I had found my self-worth in being a mom. When I read that email, it shook my world. I am a devoted wife. I am a good daughter. I am a stellar sister. And I take great, great pride in my vocation as a mother. And as my kids have grown, in many ways it has become one of the few things I am very good at. I’m not crafty, organized, and no Betty Crocker…but my Mom-ness is embedded and woven through me. And my worth has become interwoven in that role. When I received that email, I perceived it as a failure in this role I so passionately treasure.

But that’s not where my self-worth should lie. I should not be defined alone by the folded laundry, or my ability to cook dinner while helping a child with his reading. Those are all nice things, but they aren’t everything. My self-worth also shouldn’t lie in my devotion to my marriage. It shouldn’t lie in the car I drive, or the possessions I own or don’t have. It should be the warmth and grace that shines through the most frigid days… It should lie in Jesus, the ultimate comforter.

I have multiple threads that weave together and are sewn together to make who I am, but when I rely on just one of those threads to define me, they can unravel. And then I unravel.

So it’s not the end of the world. I am working on placing my self-worth in Christ who was born in the humblest of settings to save me. And I’ve been humbled through this. And I am still a good mom. And my prayers are that my kids can always trust and rest in Christ alone and that they will always know that they are worthy.

It’s Advent and it’s cold outside here… I’m sure glad my Daniel has such a warm coat.

Visit Kristin’s blog at www.joyfulmysteries.wordpress.com

Church, we have a problem, and failure is not an option!

by Robert Fontana

Yes, I know it’s Christmas, so why talk about negative stuff? Because we are symbolically on the “Apollo 13” spacecraft with a major crisis on our hands that could destroy the Church as we know it!

Recall that Apollo 13 was on a mission to the moon when an oxygen tank exploded and damaged the spacecraft’s electrical system. Commander Jim Lovell radioed engineers on earth and, in what has to be one of history’s greatest understatements, said, “Houston, we have a problem.”

Gene Kranz, the flight director, gathered engineers and set them to work, commanding that “failure was not an option.” Those engineers, coupled with the courage and skill of the Apollo 13 crew, were able to successfully bring the spacecraft home.

Church, we have a problem of immense proportions…and failure is not an option. No, it is not the shortage of vocations to the priesthood and religious life, the sexual abuse scandal, or the in-fighting over doctrine or public policy. The crisis of Apollo 13 proportions is the 43-50% failure rate of Catholic marriages (which just about mirrors the failure rate of marriages among the general population).

The negative and tragic impact of these failed marriages is gargantuan! Everything that we are about as Church depends on the strength of the family, which, in turn, relies fundamentally on
the love of spouses for its success! Catholic schools, youth ministry, and religious education programs cannot succeed without strong marriages and intact families. Vocations to public ministry as priests, religious, or lay ministers will be lacking without strong marriages and intact families.

And most importantly, preparing young people to be successful as future spouses and parents will not happen unless the majority of these young people are coming from homes where they have witnessed their parents working on their marriages, forgiving one another as needed, and succeeding, year after year in faithfulness, love, and honor.

Right now 50% of our youth do not have the best role models for married love. And in certain cultural groups or environments, the percentage of young people who DO NOT KNOW WHAT A SUCCCESSFUL MARRIAGE LOOKS LIKE IS ALMOST ONE HUNDRED PERCENT! Social workers on the Yakama Indian Reservation told me to refrain from using the word “marriage” because it has come to mean abuse, abandonment, and betrayal.

Few children there have a role model of what a successful marriage or family looks like. I’m not
talking about a perfect family, but a family that works together doing chores and setting family goals, sharing meals, working out problems without violence, and forgiving and encouraging one another.

These are basic skills that children will need to be successful not only as spouses and parents but
as citizens, workers, neighbors, community volunteers, and business owners. Talk to any grade-school
teacher, and they will tell you that a large number of children are not learning these skills because they do not see them consistently modeled at home.

Neither our Church nor society as a whole appears to realize the gravity of this problem, because
if we did, we would focus our energies year round on strengthening marriages and preparing our young people to be successful spouses and parents, and not just mention it once a year around Valentine’s Day.

Certainly there are many important issues, and not everyone in the Church is married. But with limited resources, we need to discern our most urgent needs and how our efforts can be most effective. I believe that a major investment in building stronger marriages and preparing young people to be successful spouses and parents ought to get the bulk of our attention right now. It will pay huge dividends in our future! Social scientists agree: marriage is the JACKPOT! Their latest studies show that married people have greater physical and emotional health; greater wealth; are more active citizens and community volunteers; and their children are more successful in life!

This is CLM’s commitment to building / supporting strong marriages and families.

1. We will offer all marriage and relationship education to churches free of charge. (We will accept an offering and payment of basic expenses.)


2. We will train a parish marriage ministry team to continue the work that CLM begins in building successful marriages. And…


3. We will raise the financial support from donors to make this free ministry to the churches possible.

Troubadour Readers — Help us build strong marriages in 2011!

We have four training sessions coming up this spring: one on the Yakama Indian Reservation, two at Catholic churches in Western Washington, and one at a church in Texas.

Couples attending these workshop will leave with these skills:

1. They will learn to listen to one another simply to understanding one another (not to problem-solve or win an argument).


2. They will learn to stop negative and hurtful behavior and to speak to one another on difficult topics in a way that protects the relationship.


3. They will learn to problem-solve so as to protect the unity in the marriage.

Here’s how you can help cover the cost of one couple’s attending the 12-session workshop series Discover the Amazing Gift of Your Marriage.

• $10 pays for a workshop manual


• $20 pays for one workshop session fee (if we did charge);


• $25 pays for the mileage cost


• $75 pays for refreshments, name tags, mailings, and miscellaneous expenses


• $125 helps us put an add in the local newspaper


• $240 would cover all expenses for one couple for the entire workshop!

Please consider an alternative Christmas gift for someone you love. If he/she is married, offer to sponsor him/her for one of our marriage education workshops or donate in support of our marriage outreach in his or her name (we’ll put your gift recipient’s name on our prayer list and pray for them on Thursdays throughout January). You can use the coupon below for this project. Mucho thanks, and a very merry Christmas!